Desperate Housewives Actor Fired

You got to be some freakin’ idiot to get cast on one of TV’s biggest shows, and get your ass fired just as your character’s story was going to break wideopen. But it seems that is exactly what happened to Page Kennedy of Desperate Housewives.

Now you may be asking yourself, who the hell Page Kennedy is. Kennedy plays played Caleb, the guy being held captive in Betty Applewhite’s (Alfre Woodard) basement.

According to CNN, Kennedy was fired Friday from Desperate Housewives for “improper conduct”. It seems that the studio conducted a “thorough investigation of the allegations against him”. And what praytell are those allegations? Damned if I know. Details of the investigations were unavailable, but, a CNN source did say that the misconduct didn’t involve a Desperate Housewives cast member…yeah, right!

My life is nothing more than gossip and unfounded speculation, so I personally love when details aren’t disclosed. That just gives me more time to make shit up and pass it along to you. So here are my top 5 reasons Page Kennedy got booted from DH.

(1) He was caught in Eva Longoria’s trailer sniffing her unmentionables
(2) He wallpapered the set with Teri Hatcher’s old Radio Shack ads
(3) He held down Jesse Metcalf and waxed his eyebrows
(4) He took the pole out of Marcia Cross’s ass
(5) He stole all the good scripts for this season and replaced them with the shit we are watching now.

Although Page Kennedy hasn’t released a statement, he had this to say after being cast earlier this year:

“I needed this opportunity to play this kind of character. It isn’t the kind that comes around often and it’s usually played by a name (actor). This is an opportunity for me to showcase all the years of training I’ve had.”

Seems like this was an opportunity to ruin your career and reputation. Guess we won’t be seeing you on Inside the Actors Studio anytime soon, Page. Kennedy’s last DH appearance is this Sunday. The part is being recast. Which I don’t mind because Page Kennedy isn’t that hot, and with Jesse’s a no-show this season, DH needs another piece of ass.

Update: Kristin Vietch provided more details on her site this afternoon: “My sources confirm to me that Page was fired for showing his, um, stuff to two people who work on the show (neither of them one of the main actresses, I’m told).”