Alias Recap: 30 Seconds (May 3, 2006)

Ok, another Alias episode with NO Michael Vartan?! Are you kidding me?! Let me just say that he best be in every single scene until this damn show ends.

If you missed Alias, the you’re in luck because the FABULOUS Julie wrote another kick ass recap. Make sure you check out her site, TV & Sympathy, and give her some love.
Alias: 30 Seconds
Original Airdate: May 3, 2006

Sydney arrives in Jaipur in a candy-pink suit, acting as a Southern Mary Kay type who wants to check out the customer service at a call center. Flashback to Marshall explaining to Syd how Anna’s calls are being routed through the call center — all she needs to do is get a perfume spritzer (“L’Eau de Passion” – quelle horreur!) near the wifi so they can intercept the signal. Syd spritzes the perfume around and leaves it near a desk, but it isn’t close enough. Thinking quickly, Renee spontaneously breaks in to the call center to stage a holdup as a distraction that allows Syd to access the wifi. Afterwards, telling Renee her stunt was brilliant, Sydney gives her the hard sell to join APO. Renee isn’t buying.

Sloane meets with Joseph to get details about Nadia’s resurrection. Joseph alludes to the cure being designed by Rambaldi, which is logical given that her illness was due to Rambaldi. Sloane professes he’s just there for Nadia. He is concerned, however, that the cure requires him to stop her heart, if only briefly. Oh, Sloane. What’s there to wonder? You’ve done so much worse.

Over the wifi, the APOers hear Peyton discussing a transaction with one of Anna’s contacts. They track down the contact by satellite, locating him in Zurich and get video of him opening a briefcase containing Page 47. Peyton, in Barcelona, tells the contact she wants him to decipher a message hidden in the page. Once she hangs up, Peyton talks to Anna (now Syd’s evil twin), who assures her their contact will come through.

But why, the APOer’s wonder, is Peyton meeting with one of Anna’s contacts? I can’t imagine why, but I’m guessing it’s got something to do with the fact that she’s pure evil. Jack speculates that Sloane may know something about Page 47, since he had it in his personal collection for a long while.

Meanwhile, Sloane is at Nadia’s bedside, contemplating how to restore her. He begins to suffocate her, saying “it’s the only way” as he starts to cry. She flatlines into commercial…but Sloane works feverishly to fill a syringe with the formula for her cure. Jack arrives and tries to stop him, thinking Sloane intends to put Nadia out of her misery, but Sloane pushes him away and administers the shot. Is it too late? No – to Sloane’s relief, Nadia begins breathing and regains consciousness.

Syd and Dixon puzzle over why Anna is working for Prophet Five. Rachel comes over, having ID’d Anna’s contact, Moritz, a former art forger who it turns out once worked with Renee. Marshall comes in to tell them all Nadia is awake.

At the hospital, Sloane feeds Jack a line of BS about how he revived Nadia, saying he funded secret research studies with unapproved drugs to find a cure. When he says he found his last option for Nadia’s cure in Barcelona, something clicks behind Jack’s eyes. You just know he’s thinking: “Barcelona, eh? Where have I heard that before? Sloane, you cheeky monkey!” When Sloane tells the doctor he doesn’t want any more tests, that’s enough for Jack; he calls Dixon and asks him to look up Sloane’s personal info for any details about Barcelona.

Jack confers with Dixon and Syd about Sloane’s actions. They try to convince her he’s been working with Prophet Five, but she doesn’t want to hear it until they have concrete evidence. She just wants to be with her sister….who is back at the hospital, sitting outside on a bench with Sloane. For being dead only a few hours ago, Nadia is looking pretty freakin’ awesome. I guess the nurses administer bronzer along with the daily sponge baths. What service! Nadia’s excited to see Isabellle and assumes she will be staying with Sydney, which seems to disappoint Sloane. The things you do to bring your children out of a seemingly impenetrable coma, and what do you get? No respect. When Syd and Isabelle arrive, Sloane slinks back to APO, and I actually feel kinda bad for him. I think he needs to go read Third Wheel: A Beginner’s Guide.

Back at APO, Jack approves Sloane’s request for a leave of absence, which he plans to spend with Nadia. Hoping to lead him into a trap, Jack tells Sloane that Marshall is close to deciphering the message in their copy of Page 47. If Sloane tries to get any info about it to Prophet Five, they’ll know about it. When he later sets up a meet over the phone, they do know.

Renee and Tom wait by the Seine to call the contact, Moritz. Renee flirts with Moritz, and though he’s distracted by his black-lit discovery of some kind of Braille-like specks on Page 47, he invites her to Zurich. Renee, I never knew you were such a playa.

Syd and Nadia do girl talk back at Syd’s place. Nadia’s not sure whether to trust her dad, but Syd says he was devoted to her completely while she was sick. Too bad Syd has to tell her it looks like he might be working with Prophet Five. Wanting to find out the truth about her dad for herself, Nadia goes with Jack to Sloane’s meet.

In Zurich, Renee is ho’ed out for a visit with Moritz. He’s happy to see her, and she’s happy to see Page 47. He’s less happy when she takes him hostage, punching him and dragging him out of his apartment through a big old door in the wall blasted out by Tom.

There is a shameless plug for the hybrid car Jack and Nadia are riding in. It’s so awkwardly shoehorned in that I’m wondering if I hallucinated it, since I drive a hybrid and I like to think I am as cool as Jack Bristow. Sadly, neither is true: I’m not hallucinating, and I’m not that cool.

On the less shameless side, Jack tells Nadia that Sloane isn’t the only family she has. He’s getting a mite sentimental in his doddery, it seems. Just kidding, he’s still a badass. When they arrive at the meet, Nadia gets out to observe Sloane do a briefcase switch with a contact at a storage locker, which she and Jack then break into, discovering that it contains some of Nadia’s clothes and studies from medical trials in Barcelona. Sloane, you wily bastard.

Tom and Renee have Moritz tied up and are interrogating him about Anna. He’s got a meet set with Anna for the following day, but he’s not looking forward to it, because the Page 47 Anna gave him…is a fake. He found some pigment in the page that shows it’s less than 80 years old. If he has the counterfeit, who has the original? Well…what do you think was in the briefcase Sloane just picked up? I’ll give you two guesses. No, it’s not Logan Echolls’ case files. 😉

Nadia arrives at Sloane’s house. Now that she believes his story about trying to help her, she wants to stay with him and try to rebuild their relationship. They drink some tea and have a nice, if intense moment where she admits she was angry for his role in what happened to her and he admits he needs her. It doesn’t last, because when she finds the real Page 47 she is kinda peeved that’s he’s still obsessed with the thing that caused her to lose a year of her life. He tells her it’s faith, but she tells him she doesn’t care. He has to choose: Rambaldi or her. Nadia throws the page into the fire, and Sloane rushes to retrieve it. She won’t budge, but he roughly pushes her out of the way, where she falls into a glass table that shatters. Pieces of glass are everywhere – including Nadia’s neck. Bad call, Sloane. Your daughter is dead, and you killed her. How much do you love your precious page now?

In a total shift in tone, Marshall hilariously uses some of his son’s toys to demonstrate to Jack the surveillance plan for the meet in Ghana between Moritz and Anna. Not surprisingly, Jack is less than impressed. At the meet location, Renee, Syd, Rachel, and Dixon are in place awaiting Anna’s arrival. The car arrives, but suddenly beats a hasty retreat. The team swarms, causing the car to crash, but Anna isn’t in it–she’s around the back, waiting to surprise Renee and slit her throat.

And as we watch Syd find Renee and Jack find Nadia, we hear Sloane’s voiceover, and it is calm and haunting: “A few days ago I was absolutely horrified that you would suggest I’d turn against APO, that I would kill my own daughter. I realize now that both were inevitable, that death is a necessary sacrifice, necessary to complete the final leg of this journey. I have been preparing for this my whole life. I knew it was coming. I have betrayed everyone I’ve ever loved…but I was chosen.” And he goes back to work with Prophet Five, boarding a big black plane of evil.

Sloane, you suck.

Next week: Two Sydneys, one microchip, and one hot Vaughn. I’m there!