How I Met Your Mother Recap: “Crazy Eyes”

Title: “Crazy Eyes”
Original Air Date – 11/6/2006

This is without a doubt the best episode of HIMYM this year. Things are starting to feel totally right with everyone in the show. It started out somewhat slow, and I was not too impressed with the first two or three minutes, but, then, it happened.

We all thought we knew Barney Stinson. We all thought we had his womanizing self figured out. I don’t think we could have been more wrong. He really is insecure and does not like people making fun of him, especially his name.

We open up with Ted, Marshall and Barney are sitting in a coffee house hanging out. They’re clearly bored, and Barney is complaining that they’d be having more fun in a bar. They notice that Marshall has a heart drawn on his coffee cup from the cute barista, Chloe. Ted has nothing on his, and, Barney, well, she wrote his name down as “Swarley.”

Ted: The cute coffee girl wrote a heart by your name.
Barney: (Singing) Somebody has a crush on you. Somebody thinks you’re meeee.

Marshall starts thinking and realized that every time he’s in there she laughs at his really lame joke about fitting a pumpkin into the latte cup. She must either have a really pathetic sense of humor or she must really like him. So, Marshall asks her out, and thus started this week’s chain of events.

Marshall used Ted’s trick of looking at her vulnerably and that is when he got another pumpkin latte, but, with Chloe’s digits inscribed on the side.

As Ted was telling Robin what happened:

Robin: I love that look. I think I slept with you because of that look. And it’s fake?
Ted: oh, and you biting your lower lip, shyly looking away and thrusting your chest out is natural?
Robin: Yea, I hear you.

Enter Lily, as she asks the gang to hang out at her apartment the next night for a wine tasting/catch the rat in her apartment party. Lily and Ted have to break the news to her that Marshall has a date. Lily seems to be okay with it since they’ve been broken up six months and he needs to move on.

Ted walks up to Barney in the bar and tonight’s “Swarley Fest” is on!

Ted: Hey dude, by the way. I really like that suit, tell me about the fabric, is it foreign or something?
Barney: Wow, it is foreign, I’m impressed Ted, it’s Moroccan actually.
Bartender: I’ve got a call for Swarley! Is a Swarley here?
Barney: You were never interested in my suit at all, were you?
Bartender: Swarley!
Ted: (Into his cell phone) Yea, uhh, I know he’s there, it’s really important, could you ask again?
Bartender: Important call for Swarley!
Marshall: (Walking up to their table) Jeez, can’t you hear them Swarley; there is a call for you!
Barney: Stop calling me that!

It’s at this point that Marshall introduces Chloe to the other guys. They thinks he’s hot, but, wait for it, wait for it, she has the “crazy eyes.” She’s absolutely nuts they say and they think that no matter how hot she is Marshall needs to run away, fast! In order to convince Marshall, Swarley, ehh, I mean Barney and Ted both start telling Marshall of their experiences with the crazy eyes.

Barney: Sure enough. (Cut to flashback)
Hot Girl: Barney, can I ask you a question?
Barney: Anything.
Hot Girl: Would you like to have a threesome?
Barney: Of course.
Hot Girl: Great. It’ll be me, you and Mr. Weasels. (As she holds up her teddy bear)
(Cut back to the guys in the bar)
Ted: So did you do it?
Barney: No, it ended up just being a twosome with the third one watching from a chair.
Ted: Which one were you?
Barney: I’d rather not say.

As warned though, Chloe’s craziness came bubbling to the surface while Marshall was taking a test. She called him wanting him to come pick her up. She was scared, she said that she tried to call him 9 times because a “weird midget guy” with a limp and a humpback was following her screaming her name.

Back in the apartment, Marshall and Chloe are hanging out after a date and she asks does Swarley live there too? The Swarley thing is catching on. Marshall thought he heard a crashing sound and Chloe said it was just her dropping her keys, but, he saw the picture of him and Lily laying face down on the floor, with the glass broken. Maybe she is crazy.

Marshall asks Chloe to let him look deep into her eyes. They sit down on the couch and the gazing begins. He wants to see if she’s crazy, she moves in for the kiss, and, Lily flies over the back of the couch in between the two yelling, “Stop!” Who’s crazy now?

To understand Lily though, we need to look back a few days to a scene at McClaren’s bar.

Robin: What’s up Swarles?
Barney: No. Ok, no more. I will not let this become a thing. It’s over. No more Swarley, no more Swarles, no more Swar-ley, no more Swar-wait for it-lee, no more Bob Swarley-mon, no more! No. It’s over. Do you understand?
Girls: Yes. (Barney leaves with a “Call me Swarles” sign taped on his back)

Ok, sorry for that brief aside to another Swarley Fest. I can’t stop laughing at that. Anyways, Lily is now pouring her heart out to Robin at the bar that she’s upset; she can’t stand the thought of Marshall with another woman.

Bartender: Phone call for Swarles Barkley.
Lily: He’s not here, I’ll take that.
Robin: Hey Ted, he’s not here, good one though, remember that one.

After the information that Lily gained about Chloe she heads out to see what she looks like and ends up chasing her down the street from the coffee shop. Due to the rain, an injury, and what Lily was wearing, it was her that scared Chloe so bad during Marshall’s exam. Lily saw Chloe and realized that she was gorgeous and felt incredibly threatened.

Poor Lily is now completely regretting ever letting Marshall go, and is hoping to get him away from the new threat.

*Excuse the interruption from this HIMYM recap for this breaking news alert*

PAM! TAKE A LESSON FROM LILY AND MARSHALL! GET JIM, NOW!

*And now we take you back to our regularly scheduled recap*

The gang minus Marshall is up in the apartment talking about Marshall’s new girl and they are reassuring Lily to not interfere and that she has nothing to worry about, the girl looks nuts. But, Lily notices something wrong with the apartment, the picture of her and Marshall is gone.

And this is when things got out of control. Lily snuck back into the apartment before Marshall got back from his date and was going to put the picture back out in plain view. As she was doing that, Marshall and Chloe came back, Lily accidentally drops the picture and she crawls to hide under a desk on the other side of the room.

Finally, after listening to her former fiancée on his date, she could not take it anymore. And here we see it again. Lily flying over the couch yelling “Stop!” Lily freaked out, completely embarrassed, she runs out of the apartment and Marshall followed her to the front steps.

They talk. She apologizes, and confesses to Marshall that she freaked out when she saw how cute she was. (Yes Marshall, she was the hunchback with the limp.)

Marshall: You’re crazy. You have crazier eyes than anybody I’ve ever met.
Lily: Shouldn’t you be going back upstairs?
Marshall: Lily, you are out of your mind. You’re absolutely insane.
Lily: Shouldn’t you be going back upstairs?
Marshall: I’ve missed you so much.

YES! They kiss! We have our Marshmallow and Lily Pad back! The gang finds the two on the steps and they all go out for a beer to celebrate.

All was right with the world, at least until they got back to the apartment. It was trashed! Chloe trashed it. Supposedly she was looking for her keys, which leaves us forever wondering. Ditz or psychopath? By the way, how long was she up there by herself?

As Chloe is leaving, embarrassed that she couldn’t find her keys, she introduces her self.

Chloe: Oh, I don’t think we’ve met.
Robin: Robin.
Chloe: Nice to meet you Roland. I’ll see you guys later. (Leaves)
Barney: Roland! You’re name is Roland. Hahaha. That’s funny. Right? Rockin Roland. Warsaw is the capital of what? Roland? Haha. You’re Monica Rolinsky. Hey, yea, that’s just how I’m Roland. (The gang is looking at Barney now with the “please stop” look).
Ted: Nice try Swarley.
Swarley: Damnit!

And, how can we forget the best ending of any episode of this show, ever.

Barney walks into McClaren’s alone, the entire bar yells “Swarley” and the bartender cues the Cheers theme. Poor Barney hangs his head in defeat, and leaves the bar.

Kaboom!  You’ve been lawyered by Jim Mosby.  Half Jim Halpert, half Ted Mosby.  At least that’s how he describes himself.  Maybe minus the Halpert good looks he’d be telling the truth. Jim loves feedback, and is a comment whore, so, indulge him if you can.