Veronica Mars Recap: “Poughkeepsie, Tramps & Thieves”

Title: “Poughkeepsie, Tramps and Thieves”
Original Airdate: January 30, 2007
By GMMR

Veronica Mars is by far the funniest drama on TV today. It took me almost an hour and a half to watch the show because I had to go back and rewind because I kept laughing over dialogue. So FRAKKIN’ funny…and segue.

Tonight’s first few minutes of Veronica Mars had me in TV geek heaven as the worlds of Caprica and Neptune came crashing together. Ok, let me back up a second. So remember the guy that Wallace bought the test from earlier this year? First off, you remember Wallace, right? He’s that guy that Veronica used to be friends but who has since dropped off the planet? Yeah, Wallace. Ok so Wallace bought a test from a fellow Hearst student (Max), and now Max is back and he needs Veronica’s help.

As it goes, Max (also known as the poor man’s DuckyXDale) met the love of his life, Chelsea, at last years Comic Con. The two met at a Battlestar Galactica session and stayed up talking until the wee hours of the morning. They shared a tearful goodbye at the airport as Chelsea tells Max she left her contact information next to the bed at the hotel. When Max returned, the maids had been there and her info (including her last name) were forever lost. Ain’t that a bitch.

Well now it’s a few month later and Max recevied a text message from his love saying that since she hadn’t heard from him she is going to go ahead and marry her boyfriend. Max hires Veronica to find this woman. The info she has to go on? Her name is Chelsea. She’s from Poughkeepsie, NY and she’s a BSG fan. Veronica presses for more info: “So about the one that got away. She was dressed as a Cylon and you only knew her at Six, right?” he he. Roni decides to take the case anyway.

Long story short. Max’s roommates hired Chelsea, a hooker, to pretend that she was into Max and take his V-card, which they hoped would give him more confidence with the ladies. Nice friends, right?!

Depsite knowing that Chelsea was a lady of the night, Max insists that they shared a special connection and urges Veronica to conitnue her search for her.

Veronica asks Max’s friends how they found Chelsea. As it turns out there is a search engine for hookers…who knew. Enter all the right criteria and you can get just the whore you want. “It’s like a Zagat guide for hookers. How DID people find sex before there was an internet?”

A number of adorable scenes later in which Logan and Veronica exchange witty banter about Logan’s sexual history with hookers, Chelsea (who’s real name is Wendy) is reunited with Max. As it turns out, they did share a connection and she wants out of the hooker biz and to be with her man. How very Julia Robert of you. And I just have to mention that througout these flirty scenes with Veronica and Logan, I felt like we were seeing more of Jason Dohring than Logan. I’ve had the pleasure of meeting Jason on more than one occasion and he is VERY different than Logan. And tonight, I felt like we were seeing more of Jason…at least during Logan’s more shy and vulnerable scenes. But anway…

Wendy’s pimp isn’t having it and one of Wendy’s co-workers showed up bloody and bruised and said she was in for more hurt if she didn’t return with Wendy and $1000. Max paid the moneyn only to find out the bruises were caused by makeup. Never liking to be the one who gets swindled, Veronica tries to blackmail a judge (who happens to be a client of Wendy’s) to get Max’s money back. As expected, that doesn’t go very well and Max and Veronica find themselves in a limo with Wendy’s Madame and her strength, Mr. Happy Fists. The Madame says she will let Wendy return to Max if Max pays her $10k. He agrees (I guess that whole selling tests thing is a lucrative business). Veronica, always the skeptic, thinks Max got taken again, but is later proved wrong when Wendy shows up in Max’s dorm. But in the end, Edward and Vivian they were not. Max would never be able to get over Wendy’s past, and Wendy couldn’t stay with someone who was always judging her. Eh, life’s a bitch and then you die.

Speaking of whores, our old friend Madison Sinclair makes an appearance in Logan’s apartment (sporting an awful wig…dude, VM sports some of the WORST wigs I have ever seen. Spend some money, make it believable). Veronica falsely assumes that Madison was there to rekindle the old flames with Dick. She was…I guess, in a way – but Dick Casablancas wasn’t the um, dick she was after. Veronica bumps into Madison a few days later and Ms. Sinclair lets it slip that she and Logan got it on in Aspen over the Christmas holidays. This just after Logan lied to Veronica and said his only discretion while they were “on a break” was the skank from the beach. Oh Logan…will you never learn. And Veronica, are you that in love with Logan that you are willing to so easily forgive his many, many, many flaws? I’ve got to assume he’s just amazing in bed for you to stick with him this long. Logan’s sexual escapades are once again going to cost him his woman. I ask again…will you never learn?

Over in the land of I could care less, Keith is following up on Dean O’Dell suicide…or murder. After Weevil tells Veronica that the Dean’s office was egged the night of his death, Keith follows up with the Lilith Chicks. Everyone accept for Nish was accounted for. Nish swears she was off egging the Dean’s Volvo…yeah, too bad he didn’t drive the Volvo that night. Uh oh Nishy Nish. The one good thing about this story line was Keith pulling out his old Sheriff’s uniform which led to a hilarious exhange with Veronica about strippers. If I can find the clip on You Tube it’s all yours. But believe me, my description wouldn’t do it justice. It brought the funny.

Overall a highly entertaining episode. I like how they are beefing up the weekly mysteries a bit more and letting Keith handle the mystery arch (for now at least). The show was very funny, so if you missed it, I highly recommend you heading over to iTunes later today and watching it.

Next Week: The CW gets the award for the most misleading promo…Veronica in front of a clinic…then a edited voice over saying “I’m pregnant.” Yeah right.

And let me leave you with you this little treat. Don’t say I never give you anything, ok?

Please visit VM-Caps.com for more great screen caps.