CALIFORNICATION: No Way To Treat A Lady

Hey GMMR readers! Hank’s not doing too well already! Our favorite playboy looks like he might be lapsing back into his old bad habits, now that Karen’s angry again, what’s there to lose right?

On last nights third episode of Californication, No Way To Treat A Lady, Hank and Karen send Becca off to the an all girls private school dressed in a uniform! While Karen promises not to make fun, Hank can’t do the same! Settling into their normal routine Karen heads of to her new project with Sonya while Hank’s preparing to spend the day with rock star Lew Ashby in hopes to catch some insight for the much awaited biography.

While on the job at Lew’s house Hank gets more of a look at Lew and the bands party schedule then any insight into the Great Ashby’s past. Apparently these musicians spend their days jamming out with a little liquid lunch before all divvying up a round of high end Heidi Fleiss call girls. With one call girl being the infamous naughty veterinarian wannabe, Trixie. The hooker Hank spent the night with while trying to drown his sorrows over the loss of his father last season.

Trixie seems thrilled to end up as Hank’s afternoon companion, but Hank’s not giving it up! The novelist won’t cheat on his girl. How can you not love this bad boy turned good?! Moody decides a little conversation and a pedicure sounds better. While painting the red heads toes in a shade of midnight black, Trixie tells Hank that not only does he occupy her mind while she’s doing the deed with her clients, she hasn’t been able to shake him! The escort has been waiting for the famous writer to call her since their wild evening months and months ago. Hank must be a pretty talented man.

While Karen is getting coached by Sonya’s boyfriend, the author of the Inner Artist, on the other side of town Runkle isn’t scoring too well at all! The agent, now on his own, can’t seem to find work. Finally after making a few failed attempts over the phone he runs into Daisy the porn star. Daisy is one of Marci’s clients who is determined not to be the porn industry’s next ass licker. After trying to brush Runkle off she ends up letting him get onto the “slam van”, traveling porn set the actress is currently working on!

Runkle and the sweaty director end up going at it during camera time. Runkle who is far from innocent is in shock after witnessing just what Daisy’s day at the office is like and the fact that she hasn’t drawn the line when it comes her job contracts. The pair ends up in the middle of nowhere after the director decides he doesn’t have to deal with us and drops them off on the corner!

Becca’s day seems to be looking up at her new school. The Goth girl meets a boy named Damien that appears to be the odd man out at an all girls private school. Damien is the son of a teacher who has to attend after being kicked out of his regular school. The two end up discovering they have something else in common besides just being weird, their both Guitar Hero junkies.

Meanwhile Hank is still at Lew’s defending his lady friend Trixie. The call girl leaves Hank to go service another man and ends up angry after the guy gets a little rough. The musician ends up laughing about the ladies discomfort in front of Hank. Moody doesn’t take the disrespectful act lightly and decides to jump the scruffy rocker. After pushing the leathered up Dez onto the floor Lew breaks up the fight by firing his shotgun into the ceiling. The fight breaks up and Lew wants to know what the problem is. Hanks lays out his beef and Ashby’s only concern is that Hank didn’t use his time wisely with Trix! Hank on the other hand just wants to get back down to business of writing the bio and he wants to start by finding out about Lew’s ex-wife.

Not worried about the biography, the lady is after all Lew’s favorite and Hank wasted a good time, Lew jumps Hank. Lew needs to know that he’s better than Moody in the sack. Without a definite confirmation from Trixie Lew is willing to fight for the title. Of course the timing couldn’t be better because Karen is making her ways up the steps to meet up with her man!

After discovering that Hank is fighting Karen decides to ask Trixie what the deal is. The hooker improperly introduces herself to the lady that jumped into the back of Hank’s Porsche by telling her first that she’s had both of them! Karen’s reaction is surprisingly calm! Wouldn’t you have joined forces with Lew to kick Hank’s ass? Instead after watching the two duke it out, by punching each other in the butt, Karen maintains her lady-like demeanor and exits with grace! Not most ladies reaction, but ok!

After finishing his day at the office Hank returns back to Moody Manor where a pissed off Karen lays in bed. After tucking Becca in the couple discuss the afternoon events. How well would anyone take the news that their boyfriend paid for sex? No too well. Karen expresses her anger about the writer’s previous indiscretions while Hank reminds her that she’s not all that innocent. Hank explains that he can’t change his past before getting his digs in about Karen’s marriage to the dial tone!

The episode ends with Karen telling Hank she hates him before locking herself in the bathroom and Hank smoking and drinking!

You can’t miss next week when Hank and Karen host a dinner party and Hank proposes to Karen!

In other Californication news I heard that Tom Kapinos has scored a a former Dawson’s Creek star to guest on the show sometime this season. After looking everywhere I have yet to get the low down on this piece of gossip. Does anyone have the dirt?

See ya next week!

— posted by Sarah

Sarah is from Massachusetts and currently writes for several TV and music websites. She loves Smallville, Heroes, Everwood, and of course Californication.