HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER: Happily Ever After

I have been anxiously waiting for this episode for nearly two months now, ever since I read the episode description in the casting scoop for Eric Braeden (Young & The Restless). This show excels with representing the characters’ pasts, considering that this show really takes place in 2030, it should! But when we learn more about the characters before Ted’s story started, that’s when the show’s creative energy is out in full force. And any opportunity to see Robin’s past makes me giddy!

While Future Ted is telling his kids that his first wedding didn’t end up with a happy ending, we find the gang at MacLaren’s with Current Ted reminiscing how his friends have stood by him through this rough time and they helped him get over Stella. As Lily points out, it’s only been a day. It’s been 24 hours and Ted is telling his friends that he is fine and over being left at, well, technically not at the alter. So Ted is ready to move on. A new chapter in his life is starting and Kool & the Gang is the first song on that soundtrack.

You never know what is going to come out of Barney’s mouth, except you know it will always be awesome. Barney saying that, “Ted just pulled off the greatest train dodge since ‘Stand By Me’. Not the first kid, but the other kids” is the most vivid and colorful metaphor ever! And any call back to “Stand By Me” gets rave reviews from me. Awww, I loooooove that movie! Well, I could personally do without the pie eating contest portion but that’s just me. But…anyways, back to Ted and his appearance of being fine.

Ted’s back in the apartment, putting back all his belongings, where they rightfully, eh, belong, while all his friends come in to try to cheer him up. Well, except for Barney, because he didn’t realize he’d be home. Gotta love that Barney always has a backwards way to be there for you, when you need him or when you are pretending you don’t need him. Ted’s mantra became “I’m fine” which is exactly the same motto any person that is NOT fine takes up. When someone says that, it’s like the Bat signal that the person is totally not fine. If you want people to think you are fine, please, find another way because “I’m fine” never works. “I’m fine” is probably the most throwaway statement out there, alongside “I’m good”. When you are bottling feelings up, the all-purpose statements come out, as if your mind cannot process emotions and carry a full conversation.

After two full weeks, anger set in. Not anger in Ted, he’s still fine. Lily, on the other hand, is a little furious at Ted. All of them are trying to be there for him but he’s not letting them and it’s pissing them off. Right there with ya, sister. Ever try to be there for someone and they are totally shut off, unable to get at the problem while really they are drowning inside? As a friend, you sort of feel, I guess the proper word would be impotent. Marshall wants Ted to get angry but “he’s good”. Barney thinks Ted is truly fine. He dodged the marriage bullet. Personally, I think living in Jersey is the worst of the two bullets Ted narrowly escaped, thanks to Stella running off.

I loved Ted’s “A New York Guide To Places You Might Run Into Stella Zinman”. It’s definitely handy and useful when you are trying to avoid the woman that betrayed you. And Ted, I don’t think pushing pain down with more pain and avoiding life rather than confronting it is relegated to those just from Ohio. I think that is pretty universal, not just for the residents of the Buckeye State.

While trying to figure out someplace to eat, Lily remembers a tapas restaurant that someone recently recommended to her in the white zone. Unfortunately she doesn’t remember who recommended it until that person walked in: STELLA! When you think you’ve seen the last of someone, they pop right back up. Like an annoying reminder of that pain you are pushing down with more pain. Like all great avoiders, Ted’s solution is to hide underneath the table. Don’t you love when everyone around you tells you to just confront the problem? Or rather, shove them in that person’s face. It’s so easy to say that but really, does anyone ever really tackle each of their problems every time they boil to the surface? So upon that solution, Ted points out to Lily and Barney who they would go to great lengths to avoid.

Like college-aged Lily, ninth-grade Lily has jet-black straight hair and a Goth-like appearance. Her person to avoid is Michael Sasser aka Gasser. Lily started the cruel nickname when she needed someone to blame for her embarrassing gaseous outburst in bio class. Barney’s person to avoid is Becca DeLucci, a girl he used to visit upstate. Upstate as in Bedford Hills Federal Penitentiary. Barney would go up there for conjugal visits but he made the mistake of hitting on another girl in front of her. Must have been pretty recent, he was taking catfight pictures with his iPhone. And to think, we were all worried about the girl from “The Bracket”.

Robin’s person to avoid is her father (played by Braeden). Now, this is the part I was eagerly awaiting. I am always excited to learn more about Robin’s past. She can be pretty closed off and her history is rife with comedy (as proven in “Robin Sparkles”/”Slap Bet” and “Sandcastles in the Sand”). The poor girl has her secrets. Robin was willing to let her friends believe she was in porn rather than have them know she was the Canadian Tiffany. She’s had a tumultuous upbringing and obvious daddy issues and now we know why. Her father was disappointed she turned out to be a girl. He did everything in his power to make her a boy (minus a sex-change operation). First, by naming her Robin Charles Scherbatsky, Jr. then taking her hunting at the age of 8.

Robin: “Over the years as my body developed…”

Barney: “Oh, hold on a second [pulls out recorder]. Sorry, go on.”

This combined with Barney table diving to another table following Stella’s reappearance was hilarious. So, Robin’s peewee hockey team wins some championship at age fourteen and a teammate picks on her for missing the empty net which in teen-talk leads to them making out, much to Mr. Scherbatsky’s dismay. In true soap-operatic styling, he turns around, the camera goes in for a close-up and he realizes and announces that he doesn’t have a son. You don’t have to be a soap fan to know where that shot was inspired.

I must ask, was anyone else creeped out by the fact that Cobie was making out with someone that clearly looks under-aged? I’d be surprised if he is 18 (runs to IMDb.com to check…I’m right, he’s only 17). Oh, and they weren’t doing anything serious. They didn’t go past the blue line. Apparently as a kid in Canada you put everything in hockey terms. “Red line” is getting naked and “in the crease” is pretty self-explanatory. After that, her relationship with her dad pretty much went north (yes, she said “north”, while we here in America say “south”], moved in with her mom, grew her hair out and became a Canadian pop star, you know normal stuff. Yes, we all become pop stars when our parents screw us up.

Ted man’s up and decides to confront his ghost: Stella. I loved that Marshall finally told Ted that Stella hates Star Wars in the effort to make him mad. When Stella’s cab misses the exit for Jersey, Marshall remembers that Stella is going straight home which, like Robin, made me wonder why she would buy take-out to bring all the way to Jersey. She’s not living in Jersey! Oh my gawd. She was forcing Ted to live in Jersey but for Tony she relocated herself and daughter in two weeks to New York City! All those reasons she had in her argument to stay in New Jersey was for naught. Ted just wasn’t good enough for her to move to NYC for. Yes! Like Marshall, I love Angry Ted! And would be happy to pay for that window crank. During my first viewing I was screaming at my TV for Ted not to confront Stella. Then when we got

Angry Ted I got really excited. It was like Ted was Bruce Banner turning into the Hulk. I wrote off Stella as soon as I saw her on the ferry with Tony. I didn’t need nor care to find out her ending. But Ted needed to see it in order to come to terms with Stella leaving him and that’s all I could ask for.

So, what did you think of last night’s episode? Is there someone from your past that you avoid like the plague? Was I the only person to hear that Robin’s parents are divorced (and probably just another reason Robin is the way she is)? Did you need Ted to confront Stella to get closure on their relationship?

–posted by Jen

Our HIMYM aficionado Jen is a hypocrite who hates when people “I’m fine” her yet she does the same thing to them. She is extremely excited about her trip to NYC this upcoming weekend. She has a passion for shopping, TV and chocolate, which this trip is all about. One of her hopes for the weekend is to visit Robin’s favorite hot dog spot, Gray’s Papaya during her visit.