BIG BROTHER 12 Season Premiere Recap: Beauty & Brains…but Shhh Don’t Tell

The BIG BROTHER houseguests have only been living with each other for a few days now and they are already sick of one another. Paranoia is running high. Oh this is going to be a great summer!

During last night’s season premiere, The Chenbot introduced us to the guys and gals who will be shacking up this summer in the BIG BROTHER house. As always, there’s enough muscles and silicon to make us all question their self esteem. Seriously, do you really need boobs that big?

Once again the “smart” kids are playing dumb as they think it will work to their advantage. They don’t want anyone to know how smart they really are because it might affect how people perceive them.  Right, because it takes brains to win BIG BROTHER.  May I please introduce you to last year’s winner, Jordan Lloyd. A sweetheart, whom I adored, but a Mensa member she is not.

The houseguests had just enough time to pick a bed and figure out who they were going to try to sleep with this summer when Julie called them back to the living room to let them in on this season’s twist – The Saboteur. One of the HG’s isn’t in it to win it necessarily, but merely make it to the half-way point and collect some buku bucks. As long as this mystery person isn’t voted off, they’ll collect the money.  Everyone is already a suspect.

Head of Household Competition

The first HOH competition on BB12 had the houseguests split in two teams as they had to jump on a giant hot dog and ride it from one side of the platform to the other.  Let the lazy sexual innuendos fly. The first team members across took home cash prizes with the added bonus of having targets on their back.  The last person across was Head of Household – not the most desirable position for week one. I guess no one told Hayden because he was stoked to have won the control.  Then again, he doesn’t strike be as the brightest of bulbs.

Britney got “hurt” during the competition and had to sit out. She was so hurt in fact that she could only jump up and down a few times in celebration. That girl got acting lessons from Kobe Bryant. Pathetic.

The Saboteur

The sneaky Saboteur made his first move this week by shutting off all the lights, leaving the HGs in total darkness, and taking the opportunity to padlock the food storage room and forcing all the HGs on slop for the first time this season. Color me confused, but I thought The Saboteur would actually have to do the nasty deeds him/herself. I didn’t know Big Brother was going to be playing wingman.

Editing showed Brendon getting up to brush his teeth during the black out (a little suspicious to say the least) and Andrew being a complete goon by playing a few pranks on his roomies.  Actions of both these guys put targets on their back.

America will find out next week who the sneaky devil is this season. Right now I’m thinking it’s Mensa Matt.  Although it could be Rachel, the human Jessica Rabbit. Then again, maybe it’s no one and Big Brother is just pulling all the pranks himself. I guess we’ll see soon enough.

Not the most exciting of season premieres, but it’s nice to have the show back.

Now it’s time to talk business.  Any early predictions as to the identity of The Saboteur? Your early take on the houseguests?  Who would you like to see Hayden put up for eviction?  Right now I wouldn’t mind seeing Jessica Rabbit or Andrew going home. Both are already annoying me!

While I won’t be recapping what I see on BIG BROTHER AFTER DARK (airing from 12am-3am every night on Showtime 2), I will be sharing any of the juicy details I come across in a separate spoiler post.  So check out our BIG BROTHER SPOILERS post if you want to know who is up on the block and who is playing in the first PoV of the season.  Stay tuned.

Related posts:

• BIG BROTHER 12 Spoilers
• BIG BROTHER 12: Meet the Houseguests

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