THE BACHELOR: Michelle Reaches A Whole New Level of Crazy

Quite frankly, this recap could be summed up in very few words: Michelle is still here and Brad should be yelled at a bit for that.

And because I promised this would be included in every single THE BACHELOR post until Michelle is gone, “I have to wonder what the heck [Brad]’s thinking now as he’s watching this back. Assuming he didn’t pick [Michelle], is he horrified? If he did pick her, is he second-guessing his life choices? Or maybe he thinks it’s just bad editing?”

I really hope I never have to use that again. She just gets worse and worse.

There was really no good side to Michelle this week. She was chosen to go on the group date and had a hissy fit because their activity required the group to repel down the waterfall  — and apparently Brad and Michelle vowed to only do that together after their date. However, her mood drastically improved when Brad suggested they go down the waterfall together. Of course, that was after she smacked him like 10 times to express her discontent, but still they made the journey down together, much to the displeasure of the other girls.

And Michelle didn’t get any better later.

“Watching Brad take his shirt off makes you want to go home and [bleep],” she said. “I don’t know how else to say it.” I don’t know WHAT Michelle said in that bleep — thought I can take a guess — but COME ON. Have some class, lady.

Michelle is CRAZY. The caps are needed to try and accurately portray how bad it is. Her obsession over every single girl Brad showed any interest in was tiring. We get it. You think you’re the only girl who is right for him.

And then she threatened to take matters into her own hands. Like she hadn’t already scared off America with her previous behavior? When Michelle unexpectedly showed up at Brad’s front door, he seemed shocked. Really? At this point, I’m surprised she hasn’t set up permanent residence outside his home. Their conversation was painfully awkward as she once again badmouthed the other girls, especially Chantal O., and appeared to push Brad away.

When Michelle and Brad met up before the rose ceremony, he seemed to confirm that her unexpected trip to visit him had done more harm than good. Michelle used tears and her sexuality to manipulate Brad and it appeared he came out of it feeling like maybe he had misinterpreted the previous night’s events.

Michelle, meanwhile, was distraught over her miscommunication with Brad.

“I don’t know if I’m crazy or if I’m not understanding the way he communicates,” she lamented. “It’s kind of freaking me out.” Michelle, let me break it down for you…you’re crazy. It’s that simple.

And for a brief moment I allowed myself to hope Michelle would be gone when woman after woman was given a rose. It came down to whether Jackie (AKA the Lea Michele lookalike) or Michelle would get the final rose. Because the universe hates me, Jackie was dismissed and Michelle will stay on.

She better be gone next week.

Follow @GiveMeMyRemote and @marisaroffman on Twitter for the latest TV news. Connect with other TV fans on GIVE ME MY REMOTE’s official Facebook page.

And to be the first to see our exclusive videos by subscribing to our YouTube channel at youtube.com/givememyremotetv