GLEE Recap: ‘Dance with Somebody’…Before They Graduate and Leave You Forever (Panic!)

Big thanks to Sam for taking on this week’s GLEE recap while Kath is traveling.

If Glee is a box of Cheez-Its, then tonight’s episode was the third or fourth last Cheez-It in the box. (Bear with me.) There are a few more left, but for the first time you realize the end is near. Then comes the pang of sadness. Sure, its not the last time you’ll ever have Cheez-Its. You’ll get a new box. But this particular box will be finished.

Rachel, Finn, Kurt and the other Seniors are leaving McKinley, and no matter what the show will be different. I came to this sad realization just as many of the crackers – er, characters – did tonight. Glee may not be ending yet, and the graduating cast members may not be leaving the show, but when the original cast graduates, it will definitely be the end of an era. This particular box of Cheez-Its will be empty.

Much of the melodrama of beginning-of-the-end proportions involves Kurt. The best father ever to grace my television, Burt Hummel, reveals that he feels time is moving too fast and that he misses his little boy. Per usual, Mike O’Malley is flawless and delivers the entire scene with the emotional resonance. Things will be changing next year, but I really hope the writers find ways to weave Mike O’Malley into the story.

As for the Kurt and Burt, now I know an empty nest is an empty nest, but couldn’t one of them have mentioned the silver lining of how moving to NYC meant Kurt would be so much closer to DC, and that maybe they could spend more time together?

Kurt’s real angst stems from his dear boyfriend. Blaine is also dreading saying goodbye to Kurt, a fact that initially remains hidden and manifests itself into a different problem entirely. (If there is anything we’ve learned about Blaine this season, it’s that he is a bottler of emotions. When he’s ready to break, get out of the way and the point the boy to the nearest punching bag). Kurt feels Blaine is distant, and that their relationship is approaching “lesbian bed death.”

Kurt turns to Chandler, a boy he meets in a music store for some innocent text-flirting. Blaine finds the texts and flips lid, claiming Kurt is cheating on him. Kurt denies he is cheating but does reveal he likes the attention Chandler is giving him. Kurt tells Blaine that he’s been feeling neglected and isn’t always too fond of standing in Blaine’s shadow. But when Kurt once again insists that what he’s doing with Chandler is okay, the audience is served with one of the cheesiest (and not in a good Cheez-Its kind of way) musical transitions in all of Glee.  Blaine tells Kurt that it’s not right but it’s okay and then unleashes his rage with an untz-tastic rendition of (wait for it….) “It’s Not Right But It’s Okay”.  Fearing losing Blaine, Kurt rebuttals with “I Have Nothing” in his beautiful countertenor, which seems to smooth things over somewhat. Maybe it was all that Cooper Anderson finger-pointing (don’t you DARE walk away from me) that sold it.

During a couples counseling pow-wow, Ms. Pillsbury encourages the boys to be open and honest with each other about what’s really bothering them. Blaine hilariously rattles off some of his biggest pet peeves including Kurt’s need to snap his fingers at the wait staff at restaurants and his need to sneak bronzer into Blaine’s moisturizer.  But those minor grievances give way to the real issue – Kurt’s excitement about leaving for NYADA. Blaine admits that he has been distant as he’s been practicing what life will be like without Kurt and is terrified of being left behind by the “love of his life”. Kurt insists that the two will Skype every day and Blaine will come to visit him in NYC every weekend.  With the exchange of “I love yous” Klaine is essentially back on track. (For now.)

Even though I love “Perfect Blaine,” aka “Do-No-Wrong-Blaine,” this angsty-Blaine we’ve been seeing lately (“Blaingsty” if you will…okay maybe not) is kind of exciting. He does have pain and anger under that calm exterior, which is slowly beginning to reveal itself, and Darren Criss plays it beautifully. Every time Blaine hurts, I hurt.

So with regard to this Klaine fight, and who’s in the wrong: the rational adult and bitter curmudgeon that I am would yell (at the people on TV that can’t hear me) “you are all in high school! It is unlikely that any of these people are the loves of your life!” This adult me would also say that Kurt has every right to want to meet new friends. If nothing else, he will want friends in New York, so why not get to know someone who’s moving there? But the rational, cynical, adult me isn’t usually allowed to watch Glee, and the fangirl in me is totally with Blaine on this one. Kurt was emotionally cheating. Like Blaine said, if he felt like there was something missing, he should have communicated it, instead of looking elsewhere. As for their future, I would like to see them grow separately – not as half of Klaine – for a year while Kurt is in college, and not do the long-distance thing. Maybe an unpopular opinion. But to you naysayers, I say this: just think about how much more rewarding the reunion would be.

Meanwhile, Will Schuester is having a hard time himself anticipating the graduation of his founding glee club members, and like Blaine, (but weirder) he too suppresses his feelings until it makes him a little crazy. At first, I thought his idea to move up the wedding to May was another one of his typically selfish manchild-shenanigans, and that he was just in a rush because he was having a midlife crisis or something. (Was anyone else grossed out by the way he smothered Emma’s mouth with his, while she was mid-sentence? And we were supposed to buy that that interruption-kiss convinced her it was a good idea? Blech.) I should have known, though, that those sneaky writers had something up their sleeve. Emma assures Will that the kids will still attend the wedding even if it’s in November, and he blurts out “What if they don’t?!” (Therrrre it is.) I wanted to yell “If they don’t attend, then they don’t! You’re a teacher! They’re your students! Enough with the inappropriate dependency!” But again, rationality tends to take a hike when I’m watching Glee, so my actual reaction was “Aww.” I felt for him a little bit. Those kids mean a lot to him. But then I remembered that he just pressured his OCD fiancee to rush the planning of their wedding, and booked it at a campground. And I went back to calling him a “selfish manchild.”

The other plot point worth mentioning (but barely) is this budding “thing” going on between Quinn and Joe, who I keep calling “Sam” because the guy who plays him is named Samuel. And it’s only confusing because there IS a Sam character on the show. (I call Tina “Jenna” all the time and it’s no big deal.) Also, he doesn’t look like a Joe at all. And that’s all I have to say about that storyline.

Just kidding. Joe accompanied Quinn to rehab. They sang a cute duet of “Saving All My Love,” as Rachel made a wide-eyed “hmmmm” face as if to say “interesting” and “what do we have here” and “is it just me or is there something going on between these two?” (I think at this point Rachel’s facial expressions have had more lines than Tina has.) Joe struggles between these feelings he has for Quinn and what “God says about sins of the flesh.” I think Samuel Larsen is doing a pretty decent job singing, his acting is believable, he fits into the cast pretty well. But the problem I have is that the character that’s been written for him is lacking in depth. He has these cornball lines, and is the stereotype of a stereotype. I know the kid was home-schooled and somewhat sheltered, but he wasn’t raised in outer space. Parts of his scene with Sam asking him what it was he was feeling felt like they belonged on 3rd Rock From The Sun. (That is, if they weren’t so poorly written.) So far, I think R.Murphs and Co. are totally blowing this great opportunity to write an interesting, relatable Christian character – which, from watching The Glee Project, appears to be what they intended to do. Now that we’ve seen all Glee Project “winners” on the show, I find Lindsay Pearce and Alex Newell’s characters far more compelling, and wish they had longer story arcs.

Now on to more musical things: Not since “Like A Prayer” has a Glee commercial given me goosebumps like the teaser of “How Will I Know.” The full version did not disappoint. Much like Rachel and Jesse’s “Rolling In the Deep” from season two, the stripping away of instruments from “How Will I Know” gave it new life. It transformed it from an upbeat little ditty about the perils of puppy love (and Track #1 on a cd mix I made a couple years ago entitled “Happy Eighties”) into a pensive expression of yearning – “This love is strong – Why do I feel weak?” carries a different kind of weight now. And I’d just like to say (if I may escape from McKinley High for a moment)…an a capella tour featuring a quartet of Chris/Lea/Amber/Naya is a ticket I’d buy in a heartbeat.

I wish I could sing similar praises about all the other numbers. The arrangements of “I Want To Dance With Somebody” and “It’s Not Right But It’s Okay” sucked out the soul of the originals. In the latter, I suppose the sped up tempo and harshness helps depict the Blaine anger. The “Blain-ger,” if you will. (Okay, maybe not. I’m going to keep trying.) Still, I missed me some xylophone. “So Emotional” was better, but it was still a little too fast for my taste, and it lost the groove of the original. Bonus points for Rachel’s cute dress though. As I said earlier, “Saving All My Love,” was cute, and I don’t have any stronger feelings than that towards it.

However, Kurt’s powerful and emotional “I Have Nothing” was one of the standouts for me, as was closing the episode with “My Love Is Your Love.” I thought that was an excellent choice, because it’s just one of those songs that is brimming with positivity, but not dropping with saccharine. Between having Artie and Mercedes on lead (my favorite soulful combination – I miss the likes of “Lean On Me” and “Proud Mary”) and the poignancy of the lyrics as it related to the episode’s theme of goodbyes (“it’d take an eternity to break us”) – it made my heart swell a couple sizes.

I’d love to end on that note, but I just need to point out that during that number, I’m pretty sure Tina and Mike were the only ones who didn’t get a close up as they entered the stage. #insignificantchangs

So much to discuss in the comments. Your take on the Klaine development? Is Schuester as crazy as I think he is? Yay or nay for Joe and Quinn? (Juinn? Quoe? Teen Queesus?)

*Disclaimer: Cheez-Its did not pay me to mention them in this recap. I just needed a metaphor. A horrible one, apparently.